My other blog. Moi

"Whatever doesn't kill you,
simply makes you...
Stranger."

63,4

I will quit deciding… my decisions only make it worse. Fuck it. Consciously or not, I always end up choosing the thing that will eventually hurt me. Whateeeev…
today 64,5.

You didn’t eat any fats today. You have no reason to feel that you’re going to gain weight. You went to the gym. Calm down. Please, calm down.

I’m not hungry daddy. Please don’t make me eat.

Life can suck my ass. I don’t give a shit.

WE are over.

I am over.

So screwed up and so alone… so scared.

But growing hurts, and to let go is to grow up.

IT SUCKS BECAUSE I CAN’T STOP THINKING ABOUT HIM, CAN’T STOP THINKING ABOUT ALL THE GREAT MOMENTS WE HAD, THE BEAUTIFUL THINGS HE MADE ME FEEL… I can’t be mad at him for being tired. He did love me, he just got tired of compromise. And probably me. Whatever, all I can feel is an empty hole in my body and my soul. I know I’ll get over it, but everything is so blurry right now that I don’t think I will.

Why so much struggle?

Every day is worse and worse and worse…
We’re back but he’s treating me like if I was a piece of shit… But still, I stay there… With the illusion that he will be the way he was three months ago.
I can’t keep like this, depression is worse with this. Living is harder everyday.